Thoughts

How much can change in a year? How about two? Two years ago we were home still giving Anthony pain killers from his broken finger. Worried that he would use all his time up and that once we adopted that he wouldn't have time to get paid while we were in China. I still believe that God wanted us to start the adoption process to teach us. However, I keep coming back to the verse. "For I know the plan I have for you,' declares the Lord 'plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11.Yeah I know that you have heard it, but it is so true. Looking at my two beautiful baby boys how can I not know that God, my heavenly father is in control. I make plans, but my plans are not perfect. God's plans are so much greater than anything that I can even imagine for myself.

A year ago I was concerned that Matt would have a difficult time dealing with the changes that would come once the baby was born. I can't imagine what it is like to be an only child for 8 years and then suddenly have to share everything. However, God is so awesome. I have never met someone who loved, absolutely loved their sibling the way Matt loves Trystan. Trystan thinks Matt hung the moon, but Matt is almost as protective as Anthony & I are. He worries when Trystan is sick and wants to be with him almost non-stop. We are so BLESSED!

Right now as happy as I am, I am also heartbroken. Two friends are going through some tough times. I just can't seem to get them and their families off my mind. Each time I catch myself thinking about somethign funny or something that happens when I say this can't get any better, they pop into my mind. Girls I love you and I am praying for you.

This year has also brought changes. I enjoyed 5 months at home with Trystan. Time that I will never regret taking. Then when I did go back to work, I switched jobs. I miss some of the classroom that I had, but it is so wonderful to have fun at work. We also have developed new friendships over the course of the year. We met some great people and hope that they are part of our lives for years to come.

I am starting some big changes in the coming weeks. If you read this please pray for me that I am making good choices on a minute by minute basis. What I want to do is not necessarily the right thing. I don't want to make a resolution, I want to make a lifestyle change. One that I am proud of and that my husband and family are proud of.

Here is hoping that your 2010 is better than any year that you have ever had. I am praying that God's will is revealed to you. That he is the center of your life, and if you don't know his only Son Jesus that you will have a personal relationship with him.

Always,

Carla   

Anticipation

OK, First let me say a big thanks to my buddy Jessica. You rock! This girl (because she is younger than I am) homeschools (which for sanity's sake I couldn't/wouldn't do) she bakes fabulous cakes. She designed Matt a Bakugan Ball birthday cake last week for his birthday. It was hands down one of the best cakes ever. Round and delicious. Add to that the fact that she also Blogs. I noticed a playlist on her Blog several months ago and since the stepheniemeyer (my favorite author at the moment) site also has one, I made one over the weekend. Also I was pretty tired of the standard colors and scheme of the old Blog, so she directed me in the path to jazz up this post. I like it whether anyone else sees it or not.

Now on to the Anticipation aspect. I have created a monster. In an effort to "bond" with the 9 yr. old, we rented Twilight to watch one Sunday afternoon while his dad was away playing golf. Now bear in mind that this was a week or so before school started. Needless to say I became addicted and also infected my oldest. Twihards we are. We are going to see Twilight at 9 on Thursday night and stay for New Moon at 12:01 AM. It is a school night and Matt has worked ahead on homework so that he can come home on Thursday and nap before we go off to the movies. He is really excited and is telling his friends and even his teacher that I am taking him to the first showing. It is really funny when we talk about it and Anthony rolls his eyes. We just look at each other, giggle and say he just doesn't get it. What is even worse is that the 20th is the first night for one of my two Tusculum classes. Since I don't want to be a Zombie, just a vampire, ha, ha, I am taking the day Friday to sleep. My mother thinks I am stupid. I probably am, but that is what personal days are for. I am stupid.

I started a new computer class at Tusculum last night. This one is basic computers and I am learning along with them. It is a LOT of information to cover in 6 sessions. The biggest issue is just getting in there and playing. I had fun though and I hope they will before we are finished.

Now back to the anticipation in another aspect. I can't wait until Black Friday. I have already scoped out the ads and I am probably going to Toys R Us at midnight when they open. They have a few things that would be nice, but it is also good that we are almost finished.

I couldn't resist putting another picture of the boys on here. For his birthday Matt wanted to go to Chuckee Cheese. He saved his last 5 tokens for Trystan. With the last one we got this sketch.

Photo Session and My Scaredy Cat

We went to Carowinds this weekend. Our session passes definitely paid for themselves. Matt had told us that he wanted to go to Scarowinds (a Halloween event with 8 mazes, 3 scare zones, and over 400 frightening creatures). Well long story short Matt lasted thirty minutes and Anthony laughed so hard that his belly hurt. Matt was begging to go back to the hotel to swim. We didn't even get to ride any of the roller coasters which were open. However, we did go back on Sunday and I can't even count how many rides we rode. Matt has a new record. He and Anthony rode the Hurler (Matt's favorite wooden roller coaster) so many times that the employees actually went through an entire shift rotation. Anthony said he lost count after 10 times. Even the rides we normally wait an hours for or only ride once per day had no line. Quite a bit different than the night before. I had never seen all five lanes of traffic full and lines at every ride before until Saturday night.

We went ahead and purchased our session passes for next year. I really can't wait. They already have 10 coasters and now they are adding a new Dale Earnhardt theme coaster. It will go between 75-80 mph, be 323 feet tall, and have three big drops. One is going to be 322 feet and the ride will last over 3 minutes. Also they are changing the Nickolodean section to Planet Snoopy. I can foresee Trystan and I spending a bunch of time with Snoopy.

Today Matt and I took Trystan for his 6 months pictures. Laura did a fabulous job as always. She has some sneak peeks up that are just too cute. http://mohawkmemoriesphotography.com/blog/?p=770

Trystan's New Car

It has been awhile since I posted anything on here. I thought that I would share a new picture of our little hairball and that way everyone could see how big he is getting. We decided to buy a walker. I know, they say that they aren't very good for leg muscle and can be dangerous, but my physical therapist husband fell in love with it. Since the time we saw this walker he would call it Trystan's first car. Well apparently he showed a picture to Matt and together they decided that Trystan should get the car. So I had to stop at Babies 'R Us on Friday afternoon and picked up the car then. Right now all he wants to do is eat the steering wheel.

Golf Widow

I often fuss about the amount of time that Anthony spends playing golf. One of my weaknesses (and there are many) is that I am jealous of the amount of time he spends on the golf course. Not just Nolichucky View where he is a member or at Smoky Mountain Golf Club, but any golf course. However, I realize that golf is a release for him and it allows him to remain active without a contact sport and spend time with his friends. Recently he went to Santee for his annual golf trip. These pictures were sent by Eddie Humphreys. I am really glad that Eddie took the pictures because it shows how much Anthony loves the game and that he had a great time.

Our Little Artist

On March 12th Matt was awarded the Best of Show award for Kindergarten -Second Grade at the Mosheim School art show. We had previously been notified that he would be honored at the show, but we had no idea that it would be such a momentous occasion. We delayed the Trystan's birth so that we could celebrate with Matt. The following link is to the school's web page. It shows both Matt and the other winners and copies of their award winning art pieces. 2009 Art Awards

Miracles Happen

Four years of trying to have another baby, only to be told that everything that can be done had been done. We were given the choice of trying in-vitro, but with it there are no guarantees. As many of you know that wasn't an option that we were willing to go through. All that money, when we knew that there were other children out there to adopt. So we felt led to begin the process of adopting. I felt then, and I still feel now, that going through the paperwork process was part of God's plan. At every point that we encountered a large bill or stumbling block then a check would appear of after prayer the obstacle would be overcome. So once we started really getting ready for adoption I stopped thinking about getting pregnant. I would often joke that we were going to adopt and that I would be one of those moms that gets pregnant when I was getting ready to retire. But God's plans are bigger than we can hope for or image for ourselves.


During the whole month of July I was exercising almost daily. I would use my Nike+ and I-Pod to monitor how much I was walking and at what rate. I started eating Strawberry Field Salads (a recipe that I enjoyed from Friday's) but the weight never came off. My mother was losing weight and I was gaining. What was the deal? On August 4th, I was scheduled to present at the afternoon portion of the countywide inservice. After eating lunch I stopped by CVS and purchased a three pack of pregnancy tests just to rule out the weight gain and my constant feeling bad. Before starting by first session I went into the bathroom at Chuckey-Doak High School and attempted to take the first test. No luck. I messed the test up and received an error. So after feeling bad all afternoon, I went to my grandfather's home to pick up Matt and decided to go ahead and take one of the other tests in the bathroom. Shock isn't the word. I had my grandfather even come into the bathroom to confirm that it was positive. His response was classic. "You know how you get that way don't you?" Again I believe that my grandfather being the first to know was part of God's plan because a month later he had a stroke and has been in a nursing home ever since.


Matt and I went to the Gynecologist office for another test to confirm and then went out in search of ducks. I had always said that that would be how I wanted to tell Anthony if I got pregnant, by giving him a rubber duck. Well we (Matt & I) ran into some people that we knew and he was so excited that he told them...before his Dad. I finally had to tell him not to tell anyone else before his dad. We then drove to Anthony's clinic and once he opened his gift, he immediately knew. Bear in mind that Anthony was the one that kept telling me that I was pregnant and I kept telling him that I didn't want to waste the money on the pregnancy test or going to the doctor. We decided to buy a shirt to share the news and started making our rounds to tell the grandparents.


I have had a very uneventful pregnancy. I was placed on blood pressure medication after the second doctor's visit. This is attributed to my previous blood pressure during my last pregnancy and the job related stress. During the week 20 ultrasound the baby showed off his goods immediately. This was amazing and the exact opposite of his brother. We had invited both grandmothers since the had never been able to experience this with their own children. Because Matt only weighed 5 lbs. 14 oz. and because of my age I was deemed "high risk". This meant going every month for an ultrasound and having non stress tests every week after week 32. It was amazing to see how the baby was growing and developing. At one point I actually was able to see him breathe during one of the ultrasounds.

Coming up with a name started out as a challenge. We had a girl's name picked out, but we hadn't considered that we were having a boy. So we started throwing out names. We knew that the initials either had to spell out a word or mean something.


Trystan Nicklaus Tullock was born at 6:10 PM on St. Patrick's Day (March 17th). After laboring since 5 AM without an epidural, I was given the choice at 5 PM to either use a vacuum or have the C-Section. Trystan's head as face up and the vacuum would cause a hematoma (something I didn't want after the trauma that we had due to Matt's hematoma). Since I knew that I was having surgery the next day anyway, the c-section was the choice. In some ways I feel like I have let Anthony down. He had been told that he could help deliver the baby and he had already scrubbed up and was ready to catch. At the same time Trystan's head was extremely large (14 1/4 cm) and the doctors have told me that there was no way that I could have delivered naturally. However all of this is water under the bridge. What is important is the result. We have a beautiful, healthy baby boy.


Matt adores his brother and the feeling is mutual. God answers prayers. It is in his time according to his will and purpose. Trystan completes our family. Two weeks ago I could not have imagined what my life would be like not. It is better than anything I could have envisioned.

Hospital Here We Come

I can't believe that I have been pregnant for 40 weeks. In some ways it seems like forever, in others it seems like no time at all. We are going in to be induced tomorrow...Early. We are going to Tipton's for breakfast and then to the hospital. Right now we are finishing up our last minute items. Getting cigars (real ones) for Anthony. Believe it or not they are hard to find. Filling in Trystan's baby book and making sure that we have everything packed. Basically we went and rented two movies and Anthony is actually taking a putter and cup to the hospital to have a way to pass time. While we are hoping for speedy, we are praying for healthy.

No contractions today, but I am just hoping that when we get there that I am dilated a bit more than 2, but I have learned to expect the worse, pray for the best, and it will be what God wants it to be. That is really hard for a Type A to admit. I know that throughout all the years of wanting this God is in control, not me.

I covet your prayers, especially since I won't be taking the epidural this time either. I know that I won't be myself this time, but I am going to try my best to just concentrate on what is happening, pray through the pain, and know in the end it is all soooooo worth it. I know that this is easier said than done, but I made it through last time without the epidural so if I can do it once hopefully I can do it again. Also pray for Anthony. I hope that I am halfway decent to him tomorrow and try not to grab his finger too much.

We will keep everyone updated. Anthony is going to email a picture to Matt's teacher at school if Trystan arrives before school is out. Anthony is going to block the door until Matt is able to meet his brother. Then everyone else can come visit. We are planning on having Trystan's picture put on the online nursery at the hospital. Just use the link and the first three letters of our last name. I don't know how soon they will get them up, but just keep checking. http://www.takoma.org

Just an Update

Well I started the day out feeling fine except for the fact that we are adjusting to the time change. During our Interest Session at school (wellness/track/free time) my class went out to walk and let's just sum it up that I got very ill and when I called the doc, she wanted my BP checked. It was 156/103 and wanted me to go to the hospital right away. So we were thinking, YEAH we are having a baby. Wrong. By the time I got checked into the hospital and taken upstairs my BP was down again.

We ended up staying for a couple of hours and were released to the doctor's office. They checked my BP again before we left and when I got down to the other building for the doctor they checked again. It was back up. So long story short, I am now off work for the rest of the school year. We had to select a date to be induced since we had waited too long on the spot for the 10th and they were all booked. Thursday isn't good for us for a selective induction because Matt is getting an award at the Art show, so an Irish baby for me! Unless he comes earlier.

Time's Getting Closer

This afternoon we went in for our regular weekly appointment with the OB, but also for our last scheduled ultrasound. I had had an awful day and my blood pressure was high. After laying down for awhile the numbers came down significantly. I really thought that I would be placed on bedrest since I am in quite a bit of pain. However, she would like me to continue to work since that will help bring on natural labor. Since I do suffer from continuing blood pressure issues and since I am old (in terms of pregnancy) she told us that if Trystan isn't here before the 10th of March then she would induce on either the 10th or the 12th. Good news...I have a day to set as a deadline. Bad news...I have a day to set as a deadline.

As I am looking at my to-do list, I have only 4 weeks of English lesson plans to complete for the remainder of the year. I also have nine weeks to finish for Reading though. I need to get on with it, but I am struggling with it.

At this point the guess is that Trystan is over 7 pounds. We will see. Matt was suppose to be over 8 pounds but wasn't. I am just truly praying for a healthy child.

Pregnancy Pictures

Today we had our first session with Laura Anderson at her studio in Mohawk. What fun! She spent over an hour taking different pictures of us. She has three sneak peaks that she shared which really show Anthony's personality. Check it out at http://mohawkmemoriesphotography.com/blog/ . The best part is that she is going to take our pictures again right after Trystan is born. The earlier the better because he will be able to bend better.

We have another doctor's appointment on Monday and I have a tour scheduled of the remodeled birthing center. We finished purchasing the must have items today (spent way too much money) but had a good day together. 20 years ago today we started dating. It is really hard to believe. There are only two items that I must buy and I am going to wait on them until later in the week (although if the doctor says that I am going earlier I guess I will go buy them right away.) Happy Valentine's Day!

Carla

Five Weeks and Counting

On Sunday we had the honor of being given another baby shower. My Aunt Marilyn (my mother's twin) really went overboard in a good way. We had a great time and received so many things that we are going to need in the first couple of months with Trystan. We really tried to make sure that Matt doesn't feel excluded at any point. We aren't naive to think everything is going to be smooth, but we want him to know that we love him too. Mom had a bright fluorescent yellow shirt made with his name on the front and the words "Trystan's Older Brother" on the back. We had also found a picture frame for his room that says, "I'm the Big Brother." This way he can put a picture of them in his room.

Grade reports were sent out today for the Interim period. It is really hard to believe that I will only be at work one more time, at most, for sending out grades this school year. The next time grade cards are sent out is just before my due date. We'll see if I make it. I had very few grades this time due to all that we have missed weather wise. And then we are out for another long break this weekend. It really is making the time go by quickly which is good in one way, but I feel like I just get something taught and then I am behind because we aren't where we should be at this point.

Today I was able to use the gift cards and the money that we have received and order the changing table. At first we weren't going to purchase a new changing table (I sold the one we had a week before we found out that we were pregnant), but the changing pad hangs over the dresser. The new table has a built in hamper and three storage drawers, so we can continue to use it later on. It is scheduled to come in within the next 7-10 business days. Hopefully we will still have a baby cooking at that point. I feel like I am ready in lots of ways, but it still seems like a dream.

I have to share a really cute picture from the shower. Our niece Baylee kept playing with a bag. It was so cute.

To Do List for this weekend:

1. Pregnancy Pictures Saturday
2. Purchase the rest of the must haves: Lillypads, Snappi's (for the diapers), a Tennessee outfit for Trystan's first picture,
3. Organize the rest of Matt's old clothes that we are going to save for Trystan (This might actually save some money.
4. Thank you notes
5. Celebrate 20 wonderful years together with the love of my life (We started dating on Valentine's Day in 1989)
6. Decide on the closet organization system that we are probably going to purchase
7. Try to rest

If anyone really reads this please pray for Jill Bible. She is my third cousin and is currently a missionary in Tanzania. She has developed malaria and is very ill. Please pray that the medication works and that this is just another item that can be added to help show how God is using her.

Snow Day!

We have had more snow this winter than I can remember in a long time. Not thick, deep snow. Just enough to cover the ground, cancel school, and just melt enough to be icy. We were dismissed from school early yesterday in anticipation for the snow. My students were all picked up by 12:30 and since I hadn't eaten I was hungry. More thirsty than hungry, but you get the picture. Anthony was scheduled to be a speaker at the vocational school but since they dismissed he was also out. We decided to go ahead an for Matt & I to go to Wal-Mart and pick up a few things. By the time we were finished the ground was white. When we went in it wasn't really even raining. Anthony called ahead and the doctor told me that I could come in for my appointment early.

Here is the update on the doctor's appointment. The baby is fine with a really strong heartbeat. Anthony & Matt both fell asleep while I was being monitored. However, I am dehydrated. So it is water, water, water from here on out.

This morning Anthony's mom called to say that she had heard on the radio that school was out, but hadn't received her call. After she hung up we both received our call and I tried to get to start working on lesson plans. However at this point I haven't started. Matt has watched the Open Season 2 movie and the went outside to play. After constantly throwing snowballs, he finally asked to get the sled out. You can see the results. Right now it is still hard for him to understand why I won't participate in the snowball fight or sled. Next winter will be a different story.

Nesting

Apparently I am in nesting mode. My mother has primered and painted the front bathroom. We are still only about 3/4 of the way done with the nursery but Anthony believes that we are ready just in case. I am trying to keep the house in order but, Anthony's mom and a friend of hers is helping out with that.

We had a great baby shower at the Chocolate Cafe in Tusculum on Friday. We received a lot of cute outfits, diapers, and other necessities. We had a great time with Anthony's co-workers and the food and cake was fabulous. We also are being given another shower on Sunday of next week. We feel really blessed during this time.